Showing posts with label FICTION. Show all posts
Showing posts with label FICTION. Show all posts

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Meenu's Perfect Eid





School was out for Eid and all the children were delighted. As soon as the school bell rang, all of them darted out, yelling and making a playful noise. It was a happy scene with some of the young children trying to pick up pace, some dragging their heavy school bags along, some young ones were accompanied with their elder brothers or sisters, little girls in white head scarves giggling their way back home in flocks, while boys were jumping and displaying stunts as a display of excitement; their uniforms brown instead of what should have been white. The shopkeepers in that little dingy ally usually had a tough day, and their lives clearly didn’t have much charm. Watching the children laughing and so happy were just one of the simple pleasures the day had to offer them, and they were thankful.
In this sea of children, was a little boy grinning and tip toeing his way back. He held his sister’s tiny hand, who was taking baby steps trying to catch up with her brother. Occasionally Hadi had to stop for her and she beamed thankfully at him each time. With distance, the mass of children kept on decreasing as more and more children turned to their own routes. Hadi and Menahil’s house was farther away from the rest, probably the only one to go that far. Despite the heat in this part of the world, they didn’t mind going the extra long way. They could always enjoy watching the colorful items put up for display in shops that they passed by. Beautiful dresses for ladies, some were simple, while some were adorned with small stones that seem to shine like little stars. Hadi and Menahil’s mother wore similar dresses, except that hers were very simple. She had only one dress that had shiny starry objects on them and she told them she wore it when she and their father got married. The kids were thoroughly fascinated with the way the dress had little stars on it and imagined how beautiful their mother would have looked. Hadi stopped by a big store that showcased bicycles. Ali, a boy from his class had gotten one from this very shop and everyone was in awe of it. The shop was known all over for its good name and excellent goods. Hadi hoped that his father would buy him one this Eid, as promised. The girl liked the store just next to it. It was filled with treasures for a 4 year old like her. Dolls, accessories for those dolls, teddy bears, tiny tea sets, crayons in eye catching boxes, doll houses, plastic make up kits and much, much more. There were goodies like sweets and candies in all flavors, jelly beans, Quality Street chocolates which she had at a friend’s place last Eid, yummy M&Ms and many more which she had never tasted. The only treat she had had with brother more often was cotton candy and ice lolly in the summer. She and Hadi would save some money from their weekly allowance and feast themselves over the weekend. Sometimes when she had been careless of saving, her brother would generously give her his cotton candy. She loved him a lot. He always protected her, be it at school or home. Once her brother had to stand all day in the sun, as punishment, because he had beaten up a boy who tried to bully Menahil.

“Come on Meenu”, he said as he shook her tiny hand in his. The girl was completely absorbed in what she saw. No response. “Meenu”, he tugged at it. “Let’s go home. Ammi will be waiting.” Meenu turned to her brother innocently. She had soft cheeks with a touch of pink and big imploring eyes. A dot of longing there that instantly changed into a radiant smile.
“Okay!” She jumped for the first step, then on one leg for the next three holding on his hand.
“Be careful Meenu”, he said in monotone. He smiled at the little angel. How much he loved her! She was a bundle of joy for everyone at home, and Hadi had loved her dearly since the day she was born.
“Hadi bhai...” she said panting and jumping, with her scarf coming lose on her face. She did it perfectly with her tiny hands.
“Hmmm?”
“Are you still going to get me that doll you promised?” She wanted a Barbie on her birthday but their father didn’t get her one. He said it was not as good as she thought it was, yet every girl in school believed otherwise. Being a girl, Barbie seemed like a necessary possession. She was upset and had cried till her brother promised to get her one for Eid. He had some money tucked away and had decided to add his eidi as well.
“Yes I will”, he said brightly. She was ecstatic. They walked in silence, Meenu, taking her usual baby steps and Hadi, holding her hand protectively, leading them home.
“You know why I like Eid?” she was breathless.
“Why?”
“Because”, she paused to catch her breath. “Because we have no school and we play all day… And ammi makes siwayyaan… I like siwayyaan, do you?” She looked up at his expectantly.
“Yes”, he said with his eyes on the way. “And what else do you like?”
“I like wearing new clothes and when papa gives us eidi after he returns from the mosque with you.” She was smiling all the way.
“Yes, I like that too”, he was distracted. He remembered last night, when he was up way beyond his bedtime. Their parents were talking about something. He peeped in and saw his mother put a hand on his father’s shoulders. Father looked upset.
“It’s everywhere Ayesha. Everywhere I go, the prices are so high. I’m sorry I couldn’t get you anything for Eid this year. I had to choose between us and our children. You know how Menahil loves Eid, and she’s too young to understand why I can’t buy her the toys she wants or a new Eid dress. Hadi is my son and I can’t ignore him either, can I? Ayesha”, the father took mother’s hand in his. “My dear Ayesha, how beautiful you are, and how I wished to see you in something lovely this Eid, something befitting you. I had saved for it, but with Hadi’s torn shoes, I was left with no option…”
“Hush”, she put a finger on his lips. “You must know I understand…” Hadi left after that, realizing he had heard something that wasn’t meant for him. The words stayed with him that long night and he decided not to feel sorry for himself and his family. Ever. They had each other and that was all that mattered.
“Bhaaiiiii”, Meenu’s sound caught his attention.
“What?”
“What are you thinking?” She seemed tired. With a whoosh, he scooped Meenu in his little arms and she instantly clung to him.
“Nothing Meenu, nothing.”
“Okay”, she made a face like the one she always made when she felt he had a secret from her. It only made her look cuter. He laughed.
“What’s that face for?”
She remained silent and hid her face in his shoulder. Turning into another ally, they took their last steps towards their house. It was a dirty one and no one from their school lived there. There were mud puddles everywhere from the rain last night. He walked slowly, careful not to get his new shoes wet. As he came closer, he could hear his grandfather’s voice from inside, asking his mother about the children’s return. He smiled instantly as he thought “Home!” Hadi held his baby sister protectively and knew he loved her more every minute. He promised himself he would get her that much longed for Barbie this Eid and everything else, on some bright day of his bright future. He was young, young enough to be pure and pure enough to know what real happiness truly was.
Home.


--
Writer's Note: Heartbreaking as it is, I take it on myself to write it, still. With the Ramadan in it's 3rd ishra (part) and more and more iftar parties and buffets, this is just a call to ask you people: Have you forgotten them? The ones who need your charity? Forgive me to disturb you, but I must. All that food we waste on parties and buffet, they silently feed people in homes where there's no food. They need our zakaat, yet they will not ask for it themselves. Give zakaat, give charity. The good will come back to you in many ways. May Allah be with you, all of you, everyone. Ameen.




Sunday, April 25, 2010

"Let's paint sunshine together," he said softly.

She smiled silently and returned to the canvas before. It show cased brilliant colors, the deep ones and the intense ones, just like her eyes. Deep brown eyes that shone on you till you were fully captivated by their simple innocence, the silent eyes yet adorned with brilliance so obvious it could strike you for a moment. He moved nearer.

"You don't believe me baby girl?" He said in her ear. "Here, let me show you." He came up behind her and held the hand she was painting with, the other one holding on to the rest of her possessively. Softly, he led her hand in circle as if designing a core. Deep red, deep orange, sharp yellow in an attempt to capture a passionate sun, choosing colors for her.

"I'll paint you baby" he whispered. "And I'll paint you exactly how you are to me." She laughed softly.

"You don't believe me?" He mocked an expression that complained you-don't0believ-me?


You know what girl?
I want you to know something
there were many that I have met and spent time with
but there was this one gal...
whom I have never met...
but she had this lovely heart that reached out to me
and captured my soul
let alone that calmness in her face
had things been different..
I would have gone all the way with her...
and lived all my life with her
she is an amazing woman
she is
and hopefully to me atleast
she would
always
be
my Sunshine.


-- She simply smiled.


Sunday, November 1, 2009

Our Love Story


She came to kitchen to get a glass of water. It was for the first time I saw her. I was constantly looking at her as she filled her glass. I don't know why but something in her attracted me. She was the one I had always been looking for. The girl of my dreams. Her cheeks, her small but cute nose, her smile, there was something really special about it all. Like someone I had always knew, someone I had promised to meet. She left after a minute but those 60 seconds changed my life. I came back to my seat still thinking about her. I then used to follow her everyday whenever she went to kitchen just to have her glimpse, just to see her smile. Her voice was so soft that one could really fall asleep listening to it. She was my angel with a voice of a nightingale.

If anyone scared me, it was him. I remember the first time I saw him. Our boss asked for the person who had performed best and his boss called out his name. It was the same guy who had been staring at me rather angrily for the last hour or so. The meeting was boring and I was sleepy. I had nothing better to do but to look here and there. It was then that my eyes fell on him. Our eyes met for a brief moment and he quickly shifted his glance. I did not look at him for the rest of the time I was there. I avoided him even afterwards. Changed my route, turned my face, sometimes left the place where he was. He scared me. Till one day, he was sitting next to me, explaining something I couldn't get. I instantly felt a connection. Something pulled me towards him. He smiled. His smile was the best thing about him. His eyes were softer than what they had been first time I saw him.

I finally decided to talk to her and approached her; found her sweet and innocent. I saw some sketches she had drawn and by looking at those sketches I instantly knew that the girl who was always smiling was not really happy from the inside. I wanted to know about her life and with each passing day we got closer. I started caring for her and may be that's how I won her trust. We became very good friends but for me she was always more than that.

He always used to sit across from me. It was an effort to keep myself from looking at him because I did not want him to sense my attraction towards him. I could always tell he was gaping at me. I wanted him to talk to me, but never made an advance. I was still scared.

I remember the day when she called me after having some conflict at home and we talked the whole night. She was just like a small baby looking for a place to hide and felt protected with me. This was just the start of our relationship that was now blooming beautifully. I told her that I love her. She hesitated in the beginning but finally gave in. 

He came through as a down to earth person. All my illusions about him turned out to be illusions after all. But the way he cared for me freaked me out. I did not like anybody interfering so much in my life. No one bothered if I had eaten properly or if I took my medicines on time. I wanted all that to stop. I had told my heart i had loved all I could and had no intention for another hear break. But I fell in love with him...

I don't know what will happen in the near future, she might probably leave but I do know one thing that there is no one in this world who can love her more than me. We might not be able to live with each other but we will always live in each other’s heart, we will always be in each other’s heart.
... I do not know whether I will get her in this life or not but today I want to propose to her... Honey, I love you and will always love you the same way whatever happens, wherever we may be. Love, will you marry me in the eternal life after death?

We may have no "till death do us apart"... I will wait for you. Don't be long.


Friday, October 2, 2009

And We Danced



My eyes lit up as he swayed me to the music. In a split second, I discovered the fire in me, lighting up my very existence, with dreams, new possibilites, a new flair... He held my hand softly, and I felt like a painter's masterpiece. It was how I knew arts; art always came from a place within you that was the purest. And it came to you as a gift, something that you not define, but only express, in various forms. He made me feel like a piece of art. I felt like a thousand colors, all bright and beautiful, captivating, mesmerizing, enchanting. The colors that spoke to me each day, I was one of them now; a dazzling red one moment, a soothing blue the other, gentle as white, a sophisticated pink the other, yellow with a tinge of orange like the bright sun, a seductive black, a peaceful green the other... I laughed, and the sound of my laughter broke into a thousand little pieces that he said were like music to his ears, dancing around us, making the rhythms stronger, the air more dreamy. I suddenly knew passion with innocence, the distance that came with being close, knowing yourself completely for a moment, losing yourself to someone the other.


--
on August 28th, 09.


Saturday, July 11, 2009

Painting the Sun


"Let's paint sunshine together," he said softly.


She smiled silently and returned to the canvas before. It show cased brilliant colors, the deep ones and the intense ones, just like her eyes. Deep brown eyes that shone on you till you were fully captivated by their simple innocence, the silent eyes yet adorned with brilliance so obvious it could strike you for a moment. He moved nearer.

"You don't believe me baby girl?" He said in her ear. "Here, let me show you." He came up behind her and held the hand she was painting with, the other one holding on to the rest of her possessively. Softly, he led her hand in circle as if designing a core. Deep red, deep orange, sharp yellow in an attempt to capture a passionate sun, choosing colors for her.

"I'll paint you baby" he whispered. "And I'll paint you exactly how you are to me." She laughed softly.

"You don't believe me?" He mocked an expression that complained you-don't-believe-me?


"You know what girl? I want you to know something... There were many that I have met and spent time with. But there was this one gal whom I have never met. But she had this lovely heart that reached out to me and captured my soul, let alone that calmness in her face. Had things been different, I would have gone all the way with her and lived all my life with her. She is an amazing woman. She is, and hopefully to me atleast. She would always be... my Sunshine."

A peck on her cheek and she simply smiled.


Monday, June 8, 2009

Glimpses of Her


I caught a glimpse of her as the university bus passed by. She seemed anxious to get home and glowed with excitement. She told me once it all started as something she never thought twice about, yet now she was holding her heart tightly, for fear of losing it to him any moment. I questioned her worries; I asked her what made her so weak. She had no clue.
I could see she did not want to think. She was always looking away in the distance, always avoided thinking about herself, to look inward. The fire in her was dying, her laughter couldn’t reach up to her eyes. They had become glazed. I often wanted to ask her what troubled her, left that question for fear she might lose her composure. She was surrounded by friends and I could see she was trapped. She wanted to break free but never dared; her wings were weak. She would fall.
Then I had seen her grow happy, with the laughter reaching her eyes and coloring her ever so childlike cheeks. I saw the glaze break down and the curtains falling. From the silent girl with dreams forgotten, she became someone I always thought she could be. I wanted to know more about her new found happiness but maybe she had closed her eyes to have that happiness. I did not want to ruin it for her. She had, by all means, the right to live in bliss. I wanted to look after her, but maybe she already had someone now.
A little further and I saw her standing outside the gates of a medical college. Despite the heat, she looked happy. She was thinking of someone, probably the one who was the reason of this change. I did not stop by her; I did not want to break her spell, for she looked best when she dreamt of happy dreams. I wondered if her nightmares had spared her; I remember the frightening details she once told me and prayed someone might come and hold her when she was scared. The innocent easily fall prey to evil; I hope he’s there for her every time she’s wakes up from a bad dream.
I… Oh… she’s smiling to herself. Does she even know she’s in love? Now I smile too.
I walk on till I come to a stop. She sits there head bent, talking to someone, crying bitterly. I want to know what the trouble is about. I can’t hear a word, slowly she stops crying. My heart leaps out to her, but I am happy she has someone to soothe her, so what if it isn’t me? I see her put on a brave face; wipe those tears away with the back of her hands. It’s him on the phone probably, telling her to smile and so she manages it; just for him.
I want her to triumph in love. It’s all over her face. She’s happy and strong and while he’s around, I will watch her from a distance and make sure she’s fine in her world. I want to her to know if she gets lonely, I’ll be there to save her from falling.
I pray he doesn’t go, for she loves him so!


Sunday, March 1, 2009

The Untouched

I was suffocating now, dying a slow death. Who could have found me here? It was a dark and remote place. The reason of this choice was an obvious one. I had tried to flee many a times and they had followed because they cared. Yes they really did care. And no, I wasn’t the black sheep of the family, though it always appeared to be that way.

I was lucky. Living in a place where poverty wasn’t rare, I had been blessed with the best of everything. They loved me and protected me. They provided for me to the best of their abilities and I was thankful. Sadly, their love didn’t touch my heart. No one did. Was my heart stone cold? It was. But no, it wasn’t like this always. My heart was waiting to be touched by love… it yearned to feel… it ached to be given life. With time, it grew colder and colder till it turned into a stone, the yearning and the aching still hiding somewhere deep. Love that over powered me when I saw someone less fortunate than me or someone in pain… I still had that tinge of humanity in me left. But they never tried to see me that way.

I choked. I was thirsty with no one around to give me water. My eyes fell onto the blade that lied a few inches away on the floor. That’s all it took to end it, didn’t it? I lived a life searching for that certain something that would fill up the void in me. Lived up to their expectations… pulled in sorts of directions without a word. The should’s never ended. They never did. Making it a “life” was so tough… finishing was so easy wasn’t it? Just like that… snap? I realized how little was it all… the big hype we used to make out of life… it ends just like that, doesn’t it? The blood shone back. Red. Deep red. My blood. And now it was all but a mess on the floor. It was a sad sight. It hurt… yes it did. That was me there on the floor… spilled out on the floor like a gooey big mess of red. Was I ever such a waste? I never believed so. There I was, treating myself with care… thanking God for whatever He made of me…. And here I lay, choking in a pool of blood, dying a lonely death. Solitude was something very enjoyable, provided you enjoyed your own company. But then, there was a time when I started running from my own self. I feared being alone, I feared crying… I feared remembering that I was scared. The blade told me everything will be fine. Yes it did say that… it told me that if I let it pierce through me, it’ll give me peace. The pain would be there, but the peace and calmness that followed it was promised. And so it was. It was a numbing feeling. I felt great to meet myself again. After running so much, all the hiding and lying and escaping… it had only brought me to myself. It was like a reunion… coming back home. I was happy to be alone with myself now. Self indulgent, yes? Maybe. A friend said once, ‘when you have nowhere to go, go back to yourself’. That line never really did leave me. So here I was, with myself again, somewhere where I was best understood and helped.

Tears streamed down my cheek. I was defeated and I wanted to cry my heart out on this defeat. They made me do this. Oh they made me! On and on, they chained me. If I were sane, I would’ve calmed down with time. Mine was a restless soul, destined for glory… the promised glory. Look at me now… I suddenly realized what had really become of me. They had eaten me from inside. My mind was heavy with thoughts and fears, known and unknown, since long now. I had decided to put them aside… pretend… act. But they continued to grow… the fears became stronger, bigger, firmer… till I had a doubt on my sanity. Sudden anger… venting it all out in sheer madness, wonder, and uncertainty. It became too much for me. It did!

I choked again, I choked blood this time.

I died, my heart still untouched.



picture courtesy: deviantART

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

The 'Femme Fatale'

Note: This was my first post to a group blog, Femme Fatale,  I recently joined. I intended it to be something to celebrate the diva in each and everyone of us girl. So girls, this is for you all!! With love~
--


The sky growled and it thundered loudly. The earth was damp with heaven’s waters. Not a care of the world. She enjoyed it all, every drop of it. It was something she felt very close to. Rain… when her femininity seemed to come alive and take over her completely. The look in her eyes maddened him. He leapt to grab her hand, push her close to him but she escaped narrowly. Laughing and giggling, her eyes danced as the sound of her laughter spread like magic in the air. She was playing hard to get. The little crazy creature had him running after her for days, a trance that was taking over him with every passing day. He had to have her! There was no end to this madness that now raged within him like a wild fire. She was an amalgamation of beauty, femininity and something so vividly sexy. Her alluring mass of long, thick hair reminded him of wild waves… proud and powerful. Her eyes looked like innocence captured on canvas to the very perfection of a human hand.  But wait… she was giving him that look again… oh when she looked at him like that! Her eyes turned wicked now. It was a challenge. She was part angel, part devil, and the way she changed with them was what turned him on. She knew this game too well. Up until now, he charmed the very alluring of women, casting a spell on them till they could no longer bear to be without him. They flocked around him, some fought over him, some cheated for him, some claimed to have found a deeper meaning to love. But he knew it was pure lust, mere desires of the body, that were as momentary as they could really be. His fleeting affairs with the very “sought after” women had blessed him with an arrogant air about him. He was the kind of person who wouldn’t take “no” for an answer… but the beauty that his eyes beheld seemed to take immense pride in breaking every shred of manly ego he had in him when it came to his sensuality. He was frustrated now… and she was enjoying this.


“Listen to me!” he called out to her. She heard him alright, but she didn’t stop. She was pacing fast now, going further and further away. He followed her, deciding not to give in if that was what she wanted him to. Two steps more and she looked back. A smile at the end of her full lips and that touch of naughtiness in her eyes lighted something in him again. She walked in a steady rhythm now, a proud rhythm with sensual movements clearly visible as the rain drenched her on and on. He was under a spell. He knew he had let go of even the very last bit of pride in him by following her like that. But he was doing it, partially amazed at his helplessness.



It thundered again. He knew a chance when it came. He leapt forward, grabbed her by her tiny wrist and pulled her towards himself. He grinned to himself as her eyes looked at him in bewilderment. She put on a brave face and met his eyes boldly. The eyes were doing it again. With a blink they were soft, like a baby’s, but continued to grow aware of their power as the gaze held longer. He was watching her now. Closely. The way her damp hair fell on her face… tiny drops of water trickling down her high cheekbones, down onto the earth from her delicate chin… Strangely, she smelled of the fragrance of damp earth… no... She smelled of jasmines… it was hard to make out. Her eyes blazed with a passion new to him. He had only seen weak women till now, the ones that were weak at heart and character, the ones who’d do anything to get him for a one night stand, hence his low opinion of women. But this girl seemed to challenge his entire knowledge about the female sex. She was hard to get, harder to soften up, impossible to tame. She had an air of dignity; an inner strength one couldn’t help sensing. Yet she seemed like the rest, alluring, sensual, suave. She knew the power she had over him and she knew the art of using it. Yes, it was an art for her. She was like a painter, painting his heart with a new color with wild strokes of her brush that almost killed him each time. Her full lips had an enticing delicacy to them that added to the glamour she shone with. He had never felt so numbed. He had never known the power of a woman over him. Had it been anyone else, he would have found himself in a momentary complex, yet she had a strange grace that whispered all his fears off. It was her “saving grace”, he decided to call it that. His arrogance faded and he softly let her hand go. She blew a kiss and she laughed and walked away, enjoying the rain as an innocent child would… wild and free.



She was “femme fatale”… in the best of the meanings. She could slay his heart with one look if she wanted to… yet she chose to show him something he never knew. She knew how to create magic; she knew well how to burn something wild and unforgiving in him. Her body could create desires untamed, yet her generosity could rouse a love that also knew how to gain respect and admiration. 


She was, in every way, a woman. The perfect femme fatale.




--
picture courtesy: deviantART


Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Drenched Love


Her heart broke with a louder shatter this time. She dared not make a sound. Shhh... Be silent, and maybe no will notice... if you're lucky that is.

He offered to help her. She stared at him, trying to see if he could pick up those pieces and mend them again. Can he? How I wish you could help, she thought. And then, just for a split second, she found herself in a weak moment. She kept staring at him, trying to find something in him she once believed in as a religion. Why was he not looking at her in the eye? He couldn't. Was he ever such a coward? She suddenly didn't know him anymore. Her gaze, with those silent, numerous questions, that helplessness would be too much for him, maybe. Maybe her eyes would haunt him. He didn't want that. He couldn't help it.

Silently, she walked away and out of the room where the air vibrated with this complication that now held her life at stake. She did not want to look back. No. She didn't have the courage to see that man change. It was raining heavily and she was drenched instantly. She couldn't have cared any less now. Once upon a magical time, he held her world together from falling apart. Once, his deep voice had resonated in her dreams, ridding her of fearful, sleepless nights. His eyes had been loving; his smile had been warm and his arms had been protective. And rains... it was something they both adored. Playing for hours in the rain with not a care of the world around them. They were always so absorbed, always so much fond of each other, that the whole world would fade into the background... She stopped thinking... she had to... she was going crazy. Today... oh today, the man she was leaving behind was someone else. His voice was distant, his arms no longer embraced her, his eyes could not meet hers anymore. Something was amiss; and today, despite being a few inches from each other, they were worlds apart.

The world hadn't matter once upon an enchanting moment, when the days were sunny and the nights twinkled. No one had mattered more than him when those days and nights had been filled with his innocent tokens of affection. And she was very much in love. They say love hurts. Does it? She couldn't believe. He loved her too... deeply.

But today, the man she didn't want to look back at, was definitely someone else. This had to be. I don't know where he is anymore! He never went away... he would never leave me. This is just someone else in his skin. He can never hurt me.. no he cannot. A tear fell down her cheek. How can they say he never cared? What do they know? How can they possibly know how much those little things meant? Do I need to hear it from them? He was my faith in people again and if mere mortals could be worshipped... had it been anyone else but him? No!! They don't know... They don't know how I cherish those memories... those smiles he left with me... that sense of strength he gifted me.. they don't know... no... they don't... he...

She broke down in terrible sobs. The sky weeped with her... 

... he's still here with me, in my heart... People stay with you when they die, don't they? He's just lost somewhere from where he cannot return... Does that mean he deserves to be hated by me? No... How can I hate him... how... can... She was crying bitterly. How can I possibly...? She started choking. She had to get a grip on herself. I can't go on like this. She, now, sat on the edge of a foot path and took deep breaths, trying in vain to soothe herself. Slowly and gradually she composed herself.

Today, that man she left behind didn't matter. She knew wherever he was, he still loved her. How couldn't he?

And with these thoughts, she sat on that foot path and decided to bathe in heaven's waters. Finally, it felt as if something had been left loose in her. The chains that seemed to bind her had faded. She smiled after a long time. She could feel him. He was around... inside her.





--
picture courtesy: deviantART


Saturday, December 20, 2008

Josh's Own Superman

The father clutched his son’s tiny hand warmly. 

"Do you know what I wanna be when I grow up Daddy?" The child asked him brightly.

He was his first born, just 5, but he could already find his own traces in his son. It was a sunny Sunday morning, too early for many people to be out here. But Josh has insisted. All through the week, the boy would wait anxiously for his father to come home from work. Working late, there wasn’t much time left for him to play or get involved with his son like he should. Josh was sweet boy with a heart of gold, of course like many of his age, untouched by any kind of malice. It was the age of dreams and seeing only happy endings; the age of dreaming about what one wants to be when one grows up and believing almost as a religion that it would turn out exactly that.

“What?”

“I wanna be a pilot!” The child said loudly, laughing with pure happiness. “I wanna fly and see where the birdies go off too!” His eyes shone with joy.

“And what will you do once you find out?”

“I will try to find Tootsie and then I’ll bring him home.” The child smiled, cute little dimples forming at the end of his lips as he did.

“Good! I bet we will have a great time with Tootsie”, the child seemed very sure of what Daddy said and nodded eagerly.

Tootsie was Josh’s most treasured pet parrot. Tootsie and Mr. Cuddles, the teddy bear, were the best; Grace and I couldn’t agree more. Mr. Cuddles went to bed with Josh, but the parrot stayed out of the bedroom. One day when he woke up, he realized he had left the cage near an open window, giving, Brutus, the bad neighborhood kitty, the chance to have him as his dinner. Naturally it was hard to make Josh believe that Tootsie had gone to visit friends, and maybe he’s staying because he likes it there with his old pals.

“Daddy”, Josh looked at him with imploring eyes.

“Yes baby?” he said as he pulled his son up in his arms.

“When I’m big and strong like you, will you take me to your office with you?”

“Of course I will chum!”

“And… and”, the boy was trying to think of different possibilities. “And when I’m big and strong just like you, will you still play with me?”

“Of course! You’ll be a big man like daddy is, and daddy will be proud.” He smiled warmly at Josh. Josh hugged his father.

“Daddy”, The boy hugged his father tighter. “You’re the only one who can open the cookie jar when mom can’t. I told Pete at school Daddy’s jus’ like Superman. He said his dad is stronger than my dad but then I told him you can even go into the basement without any light on and the monster in the basement can’t even scare you off!” The child laughed with satisfaction.

“Did you?” Daddy smiled at Josh.

“Yes”, the boy was in such high spirits. “And I also told him that, that day you cut yourself shavin’ and you didn’t get even kissed for it and… and it didn’t hurt you ‘cause you’re brave and… and you weren’t sad for getting’ cut.” The boy swelled with pride. “Daddy…” the boy grew serious.

“Yeah chum?”

“How come you take so many pictures of us, but you’re never in them?”

“Well…” he thought for a moment. “That’s ‘cause…”

“Daddy I want a photo of you so I can show Pete how big and strong you are!” he said without letting him finish. The boy hugged his father again and smiled. He held Josh closer to him.

“I love you Daddy. You’re the best! I wanna be just like you when I grow up!” he gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek.

“I love you too son! You’re the purest form of love I’ve seen.”  The boy clearly didn’t understand what his father meant and he didn’t either bother with it. He just hugged his Superman and clung on to his protective arms.

The day was breaking in. People were arriving in groups as the sun went on higher into the sky. Josh and Daddy turned to go home, their hearts filled with love. Wondering what mom must have made for Josh’s breakfast, he disappeared into the growing crowd, holding tightly to his father.

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picture courtesy: deviantART

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Dearest Papa!

This one was for you. As a child, I staunchly believed you were the most handsome man there is. Now that I'm all grown up, I see that beauty in you is skin deep. You are an inspiration to me and many around you. Of countless memories I have with me, I remember when I couldn't color within lines and you used to hold my hand and help me with it.  I love you Papa! For everything you are and for everything you have made of me...



I love you!


Thursday, December 11, 2008

"Friends... ?"



He had dropped by her office so suddenly she couldn’t believe it was really him. She had acted so stupid when she almost tripped over something in her confusion. He was amused at her reaction. She was obviously quite nervous and he grinned because he really did want to give her a surprise.  All the way she was silent… too stunned to speak. She had wished, yes, but never said it. Life had always seemed to have its own way ever since he stepped into it. Or was it when someone precious came by, you wanted things to work out perfectly. You would suddenly become conscious of all the things that may ruin it, and in doing so… life would seem cruel and unpredictable.


Now he was sitting before her. They were at a campus she had once studied at. She thought the greenery there was soothing and she wanted to relax now when out of her office. This certain January afternoon was a warm one and she wanted to sit on the grass, bake in the warm sunshine for a while. She had been shivering in cold when they had walked in so he gladly agreed.


“Look at you… don’t you eat something?” he was in his usual friendly tone.


She smiled but remained silent. She was observing him like she had the last time. The same wrist watch, the digital one that could tell the time from different countries of the world. That’s how he had told her about his favorite watch a year back. She giggled at the innocent memory.


“What?” he said, smiling back at her.


“Nothing…” Then she looked at his face. Two years back she had told him they were baby eyes and how cute she found them. They were their best when that pair of baby eyes looked at her. She giggled again.


What!!? Why are you laughing to yourself? Do I look funny?” He was a little puzzled but nonetheless, still enjoying the fact that he had surprised her out of her wits.


“Nothing, really…”


“No no no… now tell me why you were laughing. Right now!! Come on…”


“Oh God! It’s nothing yaar…”


“Okay I’m not gona talk to you till you tell me!” He would always do that to make her talk. It was the easiest way and she would spill it all out the very next moment.


“Well… Everything came back to me… I still can’t believe you’re sitting in front of me. It’s like a dream… So I’m just trying to… make myself accept the fact you really are here… in person.”


He laughed. The usual way.
“See?" He said. "You should have seen the look on your face! Hahaha! You went white as if you’d seen a ghost or something.” He laughed more. She kept gaping at him. She couldn’t help it. It was unbelievable and she was left… speechless.
“You’re doing it again girl.”
“What am I doing?” She said coming back to earth.
“You’re staring at me like you’re gona eat me!” He flashed her one of his boyish smiles and that crazy look of his eyes. Baby-like, she thought. “I thought I was gona meet some fashionable girl… You should look at your poses in the photographs sometimes…” saying it exactly the way he had said it last time they had met, laughing heartily. “But you’re very different really. You have such an innocent face.” She smiled and nodded lightly. Her eyes fell on his wrist again.


“What this?” She said, pointing to a thin black band-like thing he had on his other wrist.


“Oh this… it’s just something a little cousin of mine gave me.”


Rakhi sorta thing, right?”


“Emmm… yes… no… I don’t know… she gave it to me out of love, so I accepted it.”


“That’s sweet.” She smiled. “Are you a shia?” It was something she had asked the last time also. She was playing a game, repeating the things they had said the last time.


“No. Are you?” he almost winked his eyes at that, quickly realizing what she was doing.


“No,” she laughed as she said it, amused he had joined her in her little game.


He winked, "Then I guess it's okay for me to not be one either!"


Then she suddenly grew silent.


“Do you know how it’s like being light years away from you…?” He fell silent. She went on. “And do you know how going to every new place, meeting new people brings back the fact that I have never and probably never be able to have you around like friends really are?”


“I know. We can’t do anything about it can we?” he said.


“Of course we can’t…,” a tear fell down her cheek as she said that. “I’ve missed you Teddy. Going to work every day… meeting new people… those praises, big projects, incentives… all means nothing. Because at the end of the day, I know I’m only running away from myself… I try to text you, but end up saying something emo so… I don’t know what to write anymore… And you think I’m busy with stuff, absorbed in things, not giving you time… I wonder if all friends act as nutty as I do… I ...” And she broke down.


He said nothing. He just hugged her tight. It was alright again. Teddy was there.


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picture courtesy: deviantART

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P.S. Sorry for my last post guys... I was down in the dumps and I thought it better to share it with you all.... Your support and love has been immense. 
Thankyou all! *Hugs* 
xoxoxo!!!


Saturday, November 29, 2008

The Train Affair

My iPod played a Michael Buble number as my gaze held this fairy queen sitting before me…

You're a falling star, you're the getaway car... You're the line in the sand when I go too far…You're the swimming pool, on an August day... And you're the perfect thing to say...



I was lost in her... She sat there, right before me. What a beautiful sight she was to see! Looking out the window, her eyes seemed caught up in something distant. She was so lovely it was hard to keep my eyes off her. Her soft, cream colored skin was almost alluring. The high cheekbones… those pink full lips… eye the color of deep sea-blue. Cheeks so tempting, I wanted to reach out and touch them, tenderly so as not to hurt her. Oh she looked so vulnerable! But just the other moment, I sensed power in her; a woman so tantalizing had power over the very hearts of men. Her hair was an alluring mass of pure black and the way they fell over her face softened her features even more. There she was, sitting before me like a gorgeous princess under a magic spell, unaware of my hungry gaze. But then, maybe she was aware of my unacceptably rude stare and was indifferent to it. It must have been something of a usual to her. Her beauty was the kind that creeps up on you slowly and takes over you completely; she was bound to have second glances wherever she went… Suddenly her eyes moved and settled on… me! I could’ve sworn it was a dare. Those eyes were childish, and they played with me. That fascinating pair of deep blue stirred me up so bad that I was taken off guards. I was dumbfounded, looking back in surprise. She obviously found my idiotic expression funny or maybe they weren’t so idiotic after all. Maybe she only enjoyed the fact that she had surprised me. She beamed a radiant smile at me. Shall I tell how lovely that was? Those laughing eyes and the soft, curved lips! Oh she had me… I had given myself so willingly! The music danced in my head as I continued marveling her silently…

And you play it coy, but it's kinda cute
Ah, when you smile at me you know exactly what you do
Baby don't pretend, that you don't know it's true
‘Cause you can see it when I look at you…
 …
We had silent conversations throughout our journey. Now she was reading a book, yet she would look sideways and catch a glimpse of me. Whereas I was sketching something, but I was aware of her stolen glances. I am passionate about my art. I draw whenever and whatever I can. And at that time, sitting next to her, I wish I could draw her, capturing her on paper and adore the chance meeting with this beauty queen for a long time yet to come. But I didn’t say a word. Every time I used to stop to rest my eyes, I used to find her sneaking a glance at me. I would give no reaction.


The hours went by, and we became more like friends. Silent though, strangely our eyes said it all. Passing by an intriguing scene, we would look at each other and smile and then we’d return to our own selves; her book and my paper. The air held an unspoken charm with her around… the intoxicating smell of her perfume. She was no longer the proud vain beauty who was indifferent to her admirers; she was no more the powerful woman who knew how to use it as a weapon… She was sweet and generous with a deadly innocence. She could be someone easy to fall in love with; and very hard to fall out of love with…


It was absurd. I was constantly thinking of her, looking at her, silently complimenting her. What is this indefinable something between us? Why couldn’t I put this attraction to rest? I know it’s so silly jumping to far off things like these… but, is she the one? What’s that thing they call “love at first sight”? I never believed it existed… till this day. I feel like laying my life in her hands this very moment and yet I don’t even know her name! All I know is her smile melts me and her eyes burn into my soul… I was confused; one moment she looked kind and approachable, and the other, she would become distant… going back to her book the minute she sensed I was about to say something. Maybe she was just being shy… hesitant… why would she look at me that way… oh yes... maybe it was on her mind as well. I smiled to myself.


The music played louder this time…


You're a carousel; you're a wishing well,
And you light me up, when you ring my bell
You're a mystery; you're from outer space,
You're every minute of my every day…



Oh yes! This was it… I sat back and rested my eyes on her. She sensed my change of attention. Her innocent eyes wandered up from her book and then to me. She gave a childlike smile. We remained so for a few moments. Eyes locked. Finally the spell of silence broke between us.


“Are you an artist?” she pointed to my sketchbook. Her voice was almost divine, resonating in my mind like sweet music.


“Well…?” I came back to the world, in this train compartment with her.


“I hope to be.” I said with a smile. She nodded her head politely and went back to her book. What are you waiting for? Talk to her!!


“And … what do you do?” She looked at me again.


“Oh me…” She put aside her book. “I’m studying medical.” She smiled again.


“That’s really good. I could never study something as heady as that,” I said truthfully with a smile.


“Hmmm…” She became silent again and started looking out of the window.


Now what? Think, man! Think! My mind kept on pushing me. “So how many more years of your medical studies left?”


“Final year.”


“That’s cool.”


She was silent again. This time the silence was a little disturbing. I wanted to look at her, but couldn’t. I wanted to ask her name, to know her. I wanted to have her… to hold her… but she was distant again. I had loved the way she had looked at me when she talked to me. Lovely, deep eyes, that I’d love to look into all my life if she would only let me. Her hands rested in her lap, small and feminine… probably soft to the touch. I wanted to kiss those hands… to hold them and feel them… That would be a wonderful feeling! Michael Buble went on.



And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, you make me sing
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything…




We were coming close to our destination. I didn’t want this journey to end, not as long as she was here with me. When she saw the stop approaching, she bent forward towards me.


“We’re almost there.” She said looking at me straight in the eyes. I knew instantly.


“I’m sure we are…” she smiled shyly at that.



You're every song, and I sing along…
'Cause you're my everything…


The train stopped and a gust of noise came. The rumbling sound as the train was stopping, the railway guards rushing here and there to help people with their baggage and managing them. People were talking and laughing loudly, happy to have reached their destination. We still sat in our seats peacefully and silently, oblivious to the world around us. I held her hand…  


We had reached our destination also.







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picture coutesy: deviantART




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