Showing posts with label bond. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bond. Show all posts

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Meenu's Perfect Eid





School was out for Eid and all the children were delighted. As soon as the school bell rang, all of them darted out, yelling and making a playful noise. It was a happy scene with some of the young children trying to pick up pace, some dragging their heavy school bags along, some young ones were accompanied with their elder brothers or sisters, little girls in white head scarves giggling their way back home in flocks, while boys were jumping and displaying stunts as a display of excitement; their uniforms brown instead of what should have been white. The shopkeepers in that little dingy ally usually had a tough day, and their lives clearly didn’t have much charm. Watching the children laughing and so happy were just one of the simple pleasures the day had to offer them, and they were thankful.
In this sea of children, was a little boy grinning and tip toeing his way back. He held his sister’s tiny hand, who was taking baby steps trying to catch up with her brother. Occasionally Hadi had to stop for her and she beamed thankfully at him each time. With distance, the mass of children kept on decreasing as more and more children turned to their own routes. Hadi and Menahil’s house was farther away from the rest, probably the only one to go that far. Despite the heat in this part of the world, they didn’t mind going the extra long way. They could always enjoy watching the colorful items put up for display in shops that they passed by. Beautiful dresses for ladies, some were simple, while some were adorned with small stones that seem to shine like little stars. Hadi and Menahil’s mother wore similar dresses, except that hers were very simple. She had only one dress that had shiny starry objects on them and she told them she wore it when she and their father got married. The kids were thoroughly fascinated with the way the dress had little stars on it and imagined how beautiful their mother would have looked. Hadi stopped by a big store that showcased bicycles. Ali, a boy from his class had gotten one from this very shop and everyone was in awe of it. The shop was known all over for its good name and excellent goods. Hadi hoped that his father would buy him one this Eid, as promised. The girl liked the store just next to it. It was filled with treasures for a 4 year old like her. Dolls, accessories for those dolls, teddy bears, tiny tea sets, crayons in eye catching boxes, doll houses, plastic make up kits and much, much more. There were goodies like sweets and candies in all flavors, jelly beans, Quality Street chocolates which she had at a friend’s place last Eid, yummy M&Ms and many more which she had never tasted. The only treat she had had with brother more often was cotton candy and ice lolly in the summer. She and Hadi would save some money from their weekly allowance and feast themselves over the weekend. Sometimes when she had been careless of saving, her brother would generously give her his cotton candy. She loved him a lot. He always protected her, be it at school or home. Once her brother had to stand all day in the sun, as punishment, because he had beaten up a boy who tried to bully Menahil.

“Come on Meenu”, he said as he shook her tiny hand in his. The girl was completely absorbed in what she saw. No response. “Meenu”, he tugged at it. “Let’s go home. Ammi will be waiting.” Meenu turned to her brother innocently. She had soft cheeks with a touch of pink and big imploring eyes. A dot of longing there that instantly changed into a radiant smile.
“Okay!” She jumped for the first step, then on one leg for the next three holding on his hand.
“Be careful Meenu”, he said in monotone. He smiled at the little angel. How much he loved her! She was a bundle of joy for everyone at home, and Hadi had loved her dearly since the day she was born.
“Hadi bhai...” she said panting and jumping, with her scarf coming lose on her face. She did it perfectly with her tiny hands.
“Hmmm?”
“Are you still going to get me that doll you promised?” She wanted a Barbie on her birthday but their father didn’t get her one. He said it was not as good as she thought it was, yet every girl in school believed otherwise. Being a girl, Barbie seemed like a necessary possession. She was upset and had cried till her brother promised to get her one for Eid. He had some money tucked away and had decided to add his eidi as well.
“Yes I will”, he said brightly. She was ecstatic. They walked in silence, Meenu, taking her usual baby steps and Hadi, holding her hand protectively, leading them home.
“You know why I like Eid?” she was breathless.
“Why?”
“Because”, she paused to catch her breath. “Because we have no school and we play all day… And ammi makes siwayyaan… I like siwayyaan, do you?” She looked up at his expectantly.
“Yes”, he said with his eyes on the way. “And what else do you like?”
“I like wearing new clothes and when papa gives us eidi after he returns from the mosque with you.” She was smiling all the way.
“Yes, I like that too”, he was distracted. He remembered last night, when he was up way beyond his bedtime. Their parents were talking about something. He peeped in and saw his mother put a hand on his father’s shoulders. Father looked upset.
“It’s everywhere Ayesha. Everywhere I go, the prices are so high. I’m sorry I couldn’t get you anything for Eid this year. I had to choose between us and our children. You know how Menahil loves Eid, and she’s too young to understand why I can’t buy her the toys she wants or a new Eid dress. Hadi is my son and I can’t ignore him either, can I? Ayesha”, the father took mother’s hand in his. “My dear Ayesha, how beautiful you are, and how I wished to see you in something lovely this Eid, something befitting you. I had saved for it, but with Hadi’s torn shoes, I was left with no option…”
“Hush”, she put a finger on his lips. “You must know I understand…” Hadi left after that, realizing he had heard something that wasn’t meant for him. The words stayed with him that long night and he decided not to feel sorry for himself and his family. Ever. They had each other and that was all that mattered.
“Bhaaiiiii”, Meenu’s sound caught his attention.
“What?”
“What are you thinking?” She seemed tired. With a whoosh, he scooped Meenu in his little arms and she instantly clung to him.
“Nothing Meenu, nothing.”
“Okay”, she made a face like the one she always made when she felt he had a secret from her. It only made her look cuter. He laughed.
“What’s that face for?”
She remained silent and hid her face in his shoulder. Turning into another ally, they took their last steps towards their house. It was a dirty one and no one from their school lived there. There were mud puddles everywhere from the rain last night. He walked slowly, careful not to get his new shoes wet. As he came closer, he could hear his grandfather’s voice from inside, asking his mother about the children’s return. He smiled instantly as he thought “Home!” Hadi held his baby sister protectively and knew he loved her more every minute. He promised himself he would get her that much longed for Barbie this Eid and everything else, on some bright day of his bright future. He was young, young enough to be pure and pure enough to know what real happiness truly was.
Home.


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Writer's Note: Heartbreaking as it is, I take it on myself to write it, still. With the Ramadan in it's 3rd ishra (part) and more and more iftar parties and buffets, this is just a call to ask you people: Have you forgotten them? The ones who need your charity? Forgive me to disturb you, but I must. All that food we waste on parties and buffet, they silently feed people in homes where there's no food. They need our zakaat, yet they will not ask for it themselves. Give zakaat, give charity. The good will come back to you in many ways. May Allah be with you, all of you, everyone. Ameen.




Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Lost Connections


Posting this one again. Those of you who commented before, please comment again. I seem to badly need those words again somehow!
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1.30 am.

Her pillow was wet now. Just a while back she was laughing with pure joy. "Life's Beautiful!!!"... that's what her MSN status said. Now the girl's spirits were crushed again. The part that hurt her was, it was over something so small. Too small for her to even realise it could be a reason for all his wrath on her yet again.


I wish... I could tell Adi what he said... she thought between her sobs. Reached for her phone, but gave up the idea. It's no use... What will Adi possibly do? Even if he wanted to?


She wished things could change back still when it was Adi ADI ADI she'd go running to when the slightest thing went wrong... She almost felt like a baby telling him about it as if he'd make everything alright again. Well that was the magic of that friendship.


Some of that magic had departed now. Period.


Oh please... please God... for once... Tell him to come to me... Bring him to me... I know things have changed... Things... the wonderful things... they're so gone... Adi... can you really hear me? I so wish you'd know I'm hurt... and no matter how bad I want, I can't come to you now... Can you hear me buddy?


Silence.


She must be mad. How can he possibly hear her? He's thousands of miles away...


Buzz buzz buzz! It was the message beep.


"Sorry I couldn't text or call you. I'm sorry for that. Trust me I'm not in heavens here either. I'll try and get a hold of you tomorrow. Be happy and take care! Love, Adi."


Speechless... She smiled.







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picture courtesy: deviantART


Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Drenched Love


Her heart broke with a louder shatter this time. She dared not make a sound. Shhh... Be silent, and maybe no will notice... if you're lucky that is.

He offered to help her. She stared at him, trying to see if he could pick up those pieces and mend them again. Can he? How I wish you could help, she thought. And then, just for a split second, she found herself in a weak moment. She kept staring at him, trying to find something in him she once believed in as a religion. Why was he not looking at her in the eye? He couldn't. Was he ever such a coward? She suddenly didn't know him anymore. Her gaze, with those silent, numerous questions, that helplessness would be too much for him, maybe. Maybe her eyes would haunt him. He didn't want that. He couldn't help it.

Silently, she walked away and out of the room where the air vibrated with this complication that now held her life at stake. She did not want to look back. No. She didn't have the courage to see that man change. It was raining heavily and she was drenched instantly. She couldn't have cared any less now. Once upon a magical time, he held her world together from falling apart. Once, his deep voice had resonated in her dreams, ridding her of fearful, sleepless nights. His eyes had been loving; his smile had been warm and his arms had been protective. And rains... it was something they both adored. Playing for hours in the rain with not a care of the world around them. They were always so absorbed, always so much fond of each other, that the whole world would fade into the background... She stopped thinking... she had to... she was going crazy. Today... oh today, the man she was leaving behind was someone else. His voice was distant, his arms no longer embraced her, his eyes could not meet hers anymore. Something was amiss; and today, despite being a few inches from each other, they were worlds apart.

The world hadn't matter once upon an enchanting moment, when the days were sunny and the nights twinkled. No one had mattered more than him when those days and nights had been filled with his innocent tokens of affection. And she was very much in love. They say love hurts. Does it? She couldn't believe. He loved her too... deeply.

But today, the man she didn't want to look back at, was definitely someone else. This had to be. I don't know where he is anymore! He never went away... he would never leave me. This is just someone else in his skin. He can never hurt me.. no he cannot. A tear fell down her cheek. How can they say he never cared? What do they know? How can they possibly know how much those little things meant? Do I need to hear it from them? He was my faith in people again and if mere mortals could be worshipped... had it been anyone else but him? No!! They don't know... They don't know how I cherish those memories... those smiles he left with me... that sense of strength he gifted me.. they don't know... no... they don't... he...

She broke down in terrible sobs. The sky weeped with her... 

... he's still here with me, in my heart... People stay with you when they die, don't they? He's just lost somewhere from where he cannot return... Does that mean he deserves to be hated by me? No... How can I hate him... how... can... She was crying bitterly. How can I possibly...? She started choking. She had to get a grip on herself. I can't go on like this. She, now, sat on the edge of a foot path and took deep breaths, trying in vain to soothe herself. Slowly and gradually she composed herself.

Today, that man she left behind didn't matter. She knew wherever he was, he still loved her. How couldn't he?

And with these thoughts, she sat on that foot path and decided to bathe in heaven's waters. Finally, it felt as if something had been left loose in her. The chains that seemed to bind her had faded. She smiled after a long time. She could feel him. He was around... inside her.





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picture courtesy: deviantART


Saturday, December 20, 2008

Josh's Own Superman

The father clutched his son’s tiny hand warmly. 

"Do you know what I wanna be when I grow up Daddy?" The child asked him brightly.

He was his first born, just 5, but he could already find his own traces in his son. It was a sunny Sunday morning, too early for many people to be out here. But Josh has insisted. All through the week, the boy would wait anxiously for his father to come home from work. Working late, there wasn’t much time left for him to play or get involved with his son like he should. Josh was sweet boy with a heart of gold, of course like many of his age, untouched by any kind of malice. It was the age of dreams and seeing only happy endings; the age of dreaming about what one wants to be when one grows up and believing almost as a religion that it would turn out exactly that.

“What?”

“I wanna be a pilot!” The child said loudly, laughing with pure happiness. “I wanna fly and see where the birdies go off too!” His eyes shone with joy.

“And what will you do once you find out?”

“I will try to find Tootsie and then I’ll bring him home.” The child smiled, cute little dimples forming at the end of his lips as he did.

“Good! I bet we will have a great time with Tootsie”, the child seemed very sure of what Daddy said and nodded eagerly.

Tootsie was Josh’s most treasured pet parrot. Tootsie and Mr. Cuddles, the teddy bear, were the best; Grace and I couldn’t agree more. Mr. Cuddles went to bed with Josh, but the parrot stayed out of the bedroom. One day when he woke up, he realized he had left the cage near an open window, giving, Brutus, the bad neighborhood kitty, the chance to have him as his dinner. Naturally it was hard to make Josh believe that Tootsie had gone to visit friends, and maybe he’s staying because he likes it there with his old pals.

“Daddy”, Josh looked at him with imploring eyes.

“Yes baby?” he said as he pulled his son up in his arms.

“When I’m big and strong like you, will you take me to your office with you?”

“Of course I will chum!”

“And… and”, the boy was trying to think of different possibilities. “And when I’m big and strong just like you, will you still play with me?”

“Of course! You’ll be a big man like daddy is, and daddy will be proud.” He smiled warmly at Josh. Josh hugged his father.

“Daddy”, The boy hugged his father tighter. “You’re the only one who can open the cookie jar when mom can’t. I told Pete at school Daddy’s jus’ like Superman. He said his dad is stronger than my dad but then I told him you can even go into the basement without any light on and the monster in the basement can’t even scare you off!” The child laughed with satisfaction.

“Did you?” Daddy smiled at Josh.

“Yes”, the boy was in such high spirits. “And I also told him that, that day you cut yourself shavin’ and you didn’t get even kissed for it and… and it didn’t hurt you ‘cause you’re brave and… and you weren’t sad for getting’ cut.” The boy swelled with pride. “Daddy…” the boy grew serious.

“Yeah chum?”

“How come you take so many pictures of us, but you’re never in them?”

“Well…” he thought for a moment. “That’s ‘cause…”

“Daddy I want a photo of you so I can show Pete how big and strong you are!” he said without letting him finish. The boy hugged his father again and smiled. He held Josh closer to him.

“I love you Daddy. You’re the best! I wanna be just like you when I grow up!” he gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek.

“I love you too son! You’re the purest form of love I’ve seen.”  The boy clearly didn’t understand what his father meant and he didn’t either bother with it. He just hugged his Superman and clung on to his protective arms.

The day was breaking in. People were arriving in groups as the sun went on higher into the sky. Josh and Daddy turned to go home, their hearts filled with love. Wondering what mom must have made for Josh’s breakfast, he disappeared into the growing crowd, holding tightly to his father.

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picture courtesy: deviantART

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Dearest Papa!

This one was for you. As a child, I staunchly believed you were the most handsome man there is. Now that I'm all grown up, I see that beauty in you is skin deep. You are an inspiration to me and many around you. Of countless memories I have with me, I remember when I couldn't color within lines and you used to hold my hand and help me with it.  I love you Papa! For everything you are and for everything you have made of me...



I love you!


Thursday, December 11, 2008

"Friends... ?"



He had dropped by her office so suddenly she couldn’t believe it was really him. She had acted so stupid when she almost tripped over something in her confusion. He was amused at her reaction. She was obviously quite nervous and he grinned because he really did want to give her a surprise.  All the way she was silent… too stunned to speak. She had wished, yes, but never said it. Life had always seemed to have its own way ever since he stepped into it. Or was it when someone precious came by, you wanted things to work out perfectly. You would suddenly become conscious of all the things that may ruin it, and in doing so… life would seem cruel and unpredictable.


Now he was sitting before her. They were at a campus she had once studied at. She thought the greenery there was soothing and she wanted to relax now when out of her office. This certain January afternoon was a warm one and she wanted to sit on the grass, bake in the warm sunshine for a while. She had been shivering in cold when they had walked in so he gladly agreed.


“Look at you… don’t you eat something?” he was in his usual friendly tone.


She smiled but remained silent. She was observing him like she had the last time. The same wrist watch, the digital one that could tell the time from different countries of the world. That’s how he had told her about his favorite watch a year back. She giggled at the innocent memory.


“What?” he said, smiling back at her.


“Nothing…” Then she looked at his face. Two years back she had told him they were baby eyes and how cute she found them. They were their best when that pair of baby eyes looked at her. She giggled again.


What!!? Why are you laughing to yourself? Do I look funny?” He was a little puzzled but nonetheless, still enjoying the fact that he had surprised her out of her wits.


“Nothing, really…”


“No no no… now tell me why you were laughing. Right now!! Come on…”


“Oh God! It’s nothing yaar…”


“Okay I’m not gona talk to you till you tell me!” He would always do that to make her talk. It was the easiest way and she would spill it all out the very next moment.


“Well… Everything came back to me… I still can’t believe you’re sitting in front of me. It’s like a dream… So I’m just trying to… make myself accept the fact you really are here… in person.”


He laughed. The usual way.
“See?" He said. "You should have seen the look on your face! Hahaha! You went white as if you’d seen a ghost or something.” He laughed more. She kept gaping at him. She couldn’t help it. It was unbelievable and she was left… speechless.
“You’re doing it again girl.”
“What am I doing?” She said coming back to earth.
“You’re staring at me like you’re gona eat me!” He flashed her one of his boyish smiles and that crazy look of his eyes. Baby-like, she thought. “I thought I was gona meet some fashionable girl… You should look at your poses in the photographs sometimes…” saying it exactly the way he had said it last time they had met, laughing heartily. “But you’re very different really. You have such an innocent face.” She smiled and nodded lightly. Her eyes fell on his wrist again.


“What this?” She said, pointing to a thin black band-like thing he had on his other wrist.


“Oh this… it’s just something a little cousin of mine gave me.”


Rakhi sorta thing, right?”


“Emmm… yes… no… I don’t know… she gave it to me out of love, so I accepted it.”


“That’s sweet.” She smiled. “Are you a shia?” It was something she had asked the last time also. She was playing a game, repeating the things they had said the last time.


“No. Are you?” he almost winked his eyes at that, quickly realizing what she was doing.


“No,” she laughed as she said it, amused he had joined her in her little game.


He winked, "Then I guess it's okay for me to not be one either!"


Then she suddenly grew silent.


“Do you know how it’s like being light years away from you…?” He fell silent. She went on. “And do you know how going to every new place, meeting new people brings back the fact that I have never and probably never be able to have you around like friends really are?”


“I know. We can’t do anything about it can we?” he said.


“Of course we can’t…,” a tear fell down her cheek as she said that. “I’ve missed you Teddy. Going to work every day… meeting new people… those praises, big projects, incentives… all means nothing. Because at the end of the day, I know I’m only running away from myself… I try to text you, but end up saying something emo so… I don’t know what to write anymore… And you think I’m busy with stuff, absorbed in things, not giving you time… I wonder if all friends act as nutty as I do… I ...” And she broke down.


He said nothing. He just hugged her tight. It was alright again. Teddy was there.


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picture courtesy: deviantART

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P.S. Sorry for my last post guys... I was down in the dumps and I thought it better to share it with you all.... Your support and love has been immense. 
Thankyou all! *Hugs* 
xoxoxo!!!


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